I admit that I have to laugh when I hear people describe nursing as a relaxing, soothing experience for the mom. I have no doubt that this is indeed the case for some moms. I remember when I was in the hospital right after Camden was born and a lactation consultant came to my room to check in on me. She gave me a few latching tips and then mentioned that Camden should be nursing about 15-20 minutes on each side. So, 30-40 minutes of nursing total should be the norm.
I think the only time either of my kids has spent 40 minutes at my boobs is when they've passed out in a milk-induced sleep. My kids do not nurse leisurely, and when thinking of a way to describe nursing from my point of view? Well, let's just say that 'relaxing' does not top my list of adjectives.
First, let me be clear: I am so thankful that I'm able to nurse my babies. I know that's not the case for every woman, and it's not something I take for granted. But my kids? They are all business when it's time to eat (side note: I'm not still nursing Camden. He's been weaned for 2 years. I'm referring to the past when mentioning Camden's nursing habits). When it first became clear that Camden would nurse for, on average, 5-10 minutes total (not per side!), I was alarmed. For him, nursing was like a sprint: get in there, get it done, and move on with the day. No slow sipping, no leisurely relaxation in mom's arms. Eating was all business for him.
The first few days after Macey was born, she would nurse 20 minutes per side. I thought that maybe this time I had a baby who enjoyed leisurely nursing and made sure to prepare myself for 30-40 minute nursing sessions at each feeding. But then? My milk came in on the fourth day after her birth, and Macey decided that it was a good time to take a page out of her brother's feeding manual and ensure that nursing lasted no more than 5-10 minutes total. This time, I didn't freak out. I accepted what I initially tried to fight with Camden: I had another all-business nurser.
Sure, there are advantages to having a quick, efficient nurser. I am never tied down on the couch for long periods of time nursing a baby. When Macey is eating and Camden decides that he also must have something at that very moment, I can say, "Give me just a minute, buddy. I'll get it as soon as I'm done feeding Macey." And that's actually a truthful statement. Five minutes later, I'm up and getting things done again.
But there are disadvantages, too. I don't mind so much missing out on that whole peaceful, relaxation thing because really-- who has time to relax with a toddler and infant anyway? But I'm a natural worrier, and when my baby only eats for 8 minutes when it's been 3.5 hours since her last feeding? Yeah, I worry. You might recall that Camden's old pediatrician initially had some concerns about his slow weight gain during the first year of his life. And that whole experience pretty much brought out the Crazy in me, and I obsessed about his weight for months. (Yes, I'm over that now. Camden is tall and skinny, just like his Daddy. He will totally be one of those people who can eat 6 dozen donuts and never gain a pound.) But just recalling those days makes me anxious, and I have to admit that I am now the proud owner of a baby scale. As for Macey? Well, she's also a slow gainer. And while the logical part of me knows that she's likely going to be just like her brother, I still worry. And I still sometimes try to force an extra minute or two when she's nursing. (For the record? That doesn't work-- at all. When a baby decides she's done nursing, there's no convincing her otherwise and she'll offer her I'm-going-to-gag-at-any-second face as proof.)
So, that's that: I produce tall, skinny, all-business nursers. Anyone else?
Friday, November 16, 2012
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6 comments:
Both of my kids only nursed/nurse for 5-10 total once I started letting down. For Noah that happened when he was a couple of weeks old, for Isaiah it happened at like 1 or 2 days old. They only need to nurse for longer than that if you're not letting down. Once you let down that milk comes out FAST.
And for the record, they nurse for a super short time and both gained weight crazy fast. Like, a pound or more per week for the first 2 or 3 months. I don't think it has much to do with length of time nursing!
My son especially is a super fast nurser! He did take his time at first, but now it's even LESS than 5 minutes probably (he's 8 months old). I also have over-active letdown, and when pumping I can get 6-10oz in less than 10 minutes so it's not shocking that he nurses that fast!
He also doesn't gain very fast and neither did my daughter. He was huge (10lbs, 5oz) at birth but since then it's just been a slow gain. Whatever! Doc isn't concerned and neither am I.
Gwen was a 5-10 minute nurser too. I was really happy about that. I would not be happy about marathon sessions.
Oh Kerri- yet something else we have in common. when Gage was a baby they actually made me limit his intake since he spit up all.the.time. However, he almost always ate from both sides. This little booger, however, ate from both sides for like 15 mins and then decided that was enough for him. He ONLY eats from one side and as little as 5-6 mins every 2-3 hours. Gage is still teeny tiny and we've just learned to accept it. We went to his 3 year today and she said the same, wasn't concerned at all when he weighed in at a whopping 26lbs....twice the weight of his 2 month old brother. Let me know how CAm's appt. goes.
My kid's pediatrician said that if Witten was nursing for longer than 5-7 minutes on each side he was just using me as a pacifier. And e doesn't mess around, he chugs the milk like its nobody's business, so nursing never takes long. That's probably why he is the only one of my babies that actually has to be burped after he eats, because he eats so fast.
I'm sure she is eating more than enough if she's not all mad and acting hungry in between feedings. If the same thing worked the first time then its probably just that your kids will always be on the skinny side.
Oh man, that must be rough with kids who gain weight slowly/are just skinny!
My first was super slow for the first 12 weeks or so - I thought I'd go crazy after all that time spent stuck in the glider with her!! But then she got really good at it, and was done in 5-7 minutes total from then until we quit at 14 months.
My 2nd is a lot more efficient, so at 7 weeks, she takes about 20 minutes total, and often less than that. But she gained 4 lbs in her first 4 weeks so I'm not too worried ;) I expect that like her sister, she'll also get faster and we'll be down to our short sessions in a few months. Which is A-OK with me. mama's got things to do :)
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